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3 holiday food stunts that will make Texans smile. Or gag? - The Dallas Morning News

Has it been a weird year? Yeah, 2019 has been weird. And not only in restaurant-and-bar news, where Popeyes waged (and lost) the chicken war; Dallasites were accused of throwing pee at restaurantgoers; and adults went crazy for a “magic” bar.

There was also politics this year. Not going there.

Before one of the wackiest food years in recent history comes to an end, let’s look at three more strange things that fast-food companies did to get customers talking.

Weird Thing No. 1: KFC’s fire log ... that smells like chicken

Back for a second year, KFC is selling a firelog for $18.99 that will fill your home with the smells of fried chicken. Because people on the internet don’t always pay attention, the website says in all caps that the firelog (which is made of “recycled wax cardboard”) is NOT ACTUALLY FRIED CHICKEN.

Stay with me, folks: This is a log that you put in your fireplace that smells like chicken while it burns, for up to 3 hours. It isn’t a bucket of chicken you’re burning in your fireplace. Got it?

Apparently it “may attract bears.”

Weird Thing No. 2: Olive Garden’s pasta trance

Don’t have a fireplace to burn not-chicken? For the low, low price of free, you can stream an 8-hour video to your television in place of that digital fireplace. Those are cheesy, but this is cheesier: Olive Garden’s video loop is two dishes of its pasta, bubbling in the oven. For eight hours.

Note: Don’t bake pasta for eight hours.

Weird Thing No. 3: Popeyes’ ugly sweater

Popeyes' ugly Christmas sweater cost $44.95.
Popeyes' ugly Christmas sweater cost $44.95. (uglychristmassweater.com)

Popeyes released a crazy-ugly Christmas sweater with chicken sandwiches all over it. And you can’t make this stuff up: It sold out.

Stop.

It.

Popeyes.

Use the $44.95 you might’ve spent on this overpriced sweater to buy, I dunno, 11 Popeyes Chicken sandwiches — if you can find them.

Or maybe go to Chick-fil-A: They never run out!

What other weirdo food stunts have you seen this year? Tell me on Twitter at @sblaskovich.

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3 holiday food stunts that will make Texans smile. Or gag? - The Dallas Morning News
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